TIME

This place we are at is so sad.  The intensity & mixture of emotions is overwhelming at times.  As one of my friends described, “my eyes are flooded with tears.”  BUT, I do have a sense of peace deep within.  Although I do NOT understand it, I know this is God's timing.  Many have asked “what happened?”  Others have judged us without any understanding of what we are doing.  So, how did we get here?  Well, there were circumstances that led us here, but those are just the cause, not the reason . . .

*Please bare with me as I try to share my heart with you & tell the great things God is doing to show me He is in control.  My heartaches & my mind is racing, but I feel lead to share with you how good God is even when things seem out of control.  He has used several people & circumstances to speak to me & I am slowly seeing how it all comes together.  I pray the Lord allows me share what is on my heart in away that you may understand & that will bring Him glory.

About a week ago my sister called & asked me if I would help her with one of her school projects.  I excitedly agreed & asked what we’d be working on.

“TIME”

She explained that she had to create a canvas on TIME.  We began to discuss possible themes, but little did I know this was not some crafty project for me to play with.  This was the Lord whispering in my heart & I just didn’t know it at that time.

Fast forward to a couple of days ago.  Taylor & I were having a disagreement (nothing extraordinary from our usual issues with her).  Later that night she was on the phone with her mom telling her how horrible I was & I asked her, “Why am I the only one you stay angry with?  Why am I the only one that isn't allowed to make any mistakes?"  She looked at me straight in the face, her heart hardened right before my eyes . . .  I'm not sure what exactly she said because it hurt so bad my heart literally fell on the ground & a piece of me died right there.  She told me how deep inside her was this hate for me that she just couldn't get rid of . . . How I made her sick.  I could just see it.  She was gone.  My time with her was done.  The tone of her voice & the look on her face spoke louder than the words that came out of her mouth.  I felt like there was a spiritual battle going on in my kitchen & right at that very moment the devil had a hold of her heart.  I ran outside crying.  Fell to my knees & cried out to God.  I poured my heart out to Him. When I finally returned to the house I told Tim & Taylor both that I was done & that it was time for her to call her mom.  Tim cried, but stood right behind me.  He told her he didn't know what else I could do or what either of us could do differently, but he wasn't going to allow her to tear our home apart like this any longer.  We both told her we loved her & would be praying for her, but it was time.

At first I didn’t understand all of this at.all.  I couldn’t have even explained what happened for a few days.  Sunday at church our preacher spoke on 1 John.  He told the story of Pharaoh & the plagues.  As I listened to him tell how Pharaoh repeatedly refused to obey God & each time his heart was hardened I gained my first glimpse of what the Lord was doing in our home.  I had words to put with what had happened the night before. 

Then as I read through each of the comments on my last post, I found such comfort in the comment one of you left:

You have been doing what the Bible instructs parents to do - raise your daughter to know the LORD and to obey His Word. She needs to know that she is a sinner - like we all are - and that she needs a Savior. Then she needs to know that once you make that commitment to Christ, there are some rules to follow - not that we will be perfect at following them - but that we are to strive for and love perfect obedience to our Savior. And for children that obedience to the Savior includes obedience to our parents as our authority covering. I'm thankful that God loves your little girl so much more than you ever could, and I know that He will be working in her life even harder. This is His plan though our understanding is not. And His plans are always perfect and will be brought to completion.
I will pray for you all for peace and acceptance of His plan, that the other side of the tapestry will be revealed in all its glory when the time is right.

THANK YOU!!  It was almost as if you looked deep inside my heart & spoke the words I could not find.  I hope you know dear friend that the Lord used you to speak to me.  Many blessings!

The past few days have been very sad.  I was struggling with feeling like I failed.  Tim was consumed with worry & fear.  Then a friend called me . . .

Back up several months ago.  A close friend of mine had asked me if I would help her pick out some curriculum for her to do a state study.  She didn’t feel comfortable with what she was using because it wasn’t from a Christian perspective.  What I picked out solved that problem & appeared to be within her financial means.  A couple weeks pasted & I asked her if she had ordered her curriculum.  Disappointedly she explained something had come up & she hadn’t been able.  Well, I had been blessed with several photoshoots & was pondering what to do with 10% of my earnings.  I was planning on tithing it, but God told me to order curriculum for her instead.  The total was almost exact to the 10%.  Her curriculum arrived & she was exasperated with the blessing.  It was the Lord is all I told her. 

. . . She called a couple days ago & explained that they had just begun their study & she had to read me the introduction which began with a brief reference to Ecclesiastes 3:

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

A Time for Everything

There is a time for everything,
       and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
       a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal,
       a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,
       a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
       a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a time to search and a time to give up,
       a time to keep and a time to throw away,

a time to tear and a time to mend,
       a time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,
       a time for war and a time for peace.

. . . these times are ordained by God Himself & are not under our control.  These are His times.  It is evident in Lydia’s *salvation that even the time of our mourning over sin & turning to Christ is one of His times in our lives.

He has ordained all the times in our lives.  There is no such thing as chance, luck, or accident in the Christian journey.  Our times of planting, sewing, laughter, sorrow, mourning, and financial prosperity or loss are under His control.  If we look to Him during these times we eventually truly see that He has made everything beautiful in His time.

All things work together for good to them that love God to them who are called according to his purpose”  Romans 8:28

Because we know that God is providentially controlling the events of our lives & we know that his hand of providence is guided by his heart of love we are able to do as we are instructed in Psalms 41:10  “Be Still & Know that I am God”.

*This was taken from the introduction of the Texas State History curriculum from State History From a Christian Perspective.

I have to tell you the peace that came over me almost instantly as she read this to me.  God was no longer whispering, He was clearly speaking loud & clear.  You see, these scriptures were the 2 scriptures that I clinged to when Tim’s mom died.  The first passage I picked out & added to the video I made for her funeral:

The other scripture was the basis for the message preached at her funeral.  This woman was not just my mother-in-law, she was my best friend.  She was a major part of all of our lives.  I love her soooo much & miss her tremendously.  When my friend shared these scriptures with me it was much needed confirmation that God was at work in our family.

To some it may seem like we have thrown our daughter to the wolves.  To others it may appear that we have given up on her.  A few assume we don’t want her anymore. 

None of this is in our hearts.  We love our daughter very much.  Living with her mother has been something she has wanted for a very long time now.  So it is not like we have washed our hands of her & sent her away.  We have not given up on her.  We have given her to the Lord.  Just as the father of the prodigal son had to let his son go, we must let our daughter go.

*Over the last few days I have struggled with what exactly to pray for.  The only thing I truly know without a doubt is to pray for her salvation.  It honestly is not important where she lives or who she lives with here on earth.  The most important thing is that she learns to live for a much bigger purpose.  We are not meant to be comfortable on this earth or to become of this world.  Our focus should be on our heavenly home with our Father in heaven.  So wherever she is.  Whatever happens, my prayer is that it all works to a greater good & serves as a part of His plan.

“In Him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of Him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of His will”  Ephesians 1:11

The Lord has used so many people to open my eyes, to allow me to see His presence, & feel Him at doing what He does best – Being God.  In complete control.  I’m not certain of very much & there is still a lot I don’t understand, but I promise you, He is at work in our daughter’s life & I feel something big is going to happen.  Tonight as I read other posts from blogs in my reader I heard the Lord speaking one more time.  McMama posted this quote from Francis Chan at the end of one of her posts today,

“It is true that God may have called you to be exactly where you are. But, it is absolutely vital to grasp that he didn’t call you there so you could settle in and live your life in comfort and superficial peace…God doesn’t call us to be comfortable. He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations where we will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through”

There was no doubt in my mind that God brought Taylor to our house when He did 5 years ago.  Her coming to live with us was an answered prayer, a total God Thing.  And now her leaving has left us in a situation where our child will be in trouble if He doesn’t come through.  We are unafraid to trust God completely with our child.  I refuse to question or doubt my faithful loving Father.  I trust that He is in control & that He will work it all out - in His time. 

Emptiness . . . Failure . . . Heartache . . .

I never ever in a million years would have imagined I would be feeling this pain again . . . this emptiness, sense of failure, & total brokenness that my heart aches to the point that I am sick to my stomach.

Eight years ago Tim & I were newlyweds of only a few months & were sucked into a darkness of not only one court battle for custody of Taylor, but also a second as I fought with all I had to protect Tyler from a situation I felt wasn’t safe for him.  Then right smack in the middle of it all we lost our first child together, our son Talon.  I remember the mix of emotions that raced through my mind & consumed my heart – often sending me into crying fits or rages of anger.  The pain was almost unbearable.  It all seemed so unreal.  For all 3 of our children, we fought so hard, yet seemed to have lost them all in one way or another.

Fast forward a couple years . . . We are blessed with a beautiful baby boy who instantly stole all of our hearts, 18 months later we are blessed with another beautiful baby boy, Taylor comes to live with us (*without a fight) and Tyler’s situation gradually improves.  Life is good.  Not that we didn’t have our fair share of storms along the way.  But through it all – we had our children.

Tonight the boys are all tucked in their beds, but our daughter’s bed is empty.  She is gone.  She went to live with her mother.  And although she is still very much alive, I feel like we have lost her.  We both know the environment that she will be living in & how quickly it will change her – our sweet girl has changed so much we hardly recognize her anymore.  And once again our hearts are filled with emptiness. 

I’m not sure how much I will decide to share on my blog about this, but for now I want to ask you for your prayers as we all adjust to this new life apart.  I will probably be absent from my blog for a little bit.  I’m quite the array of emotions as one minute I feel so sad and the next I’m so mad I could scream.  I feel like I have failed.  I have failed our daughter.  And more so, I feel like I have failed a task the Lord gave me.  I’m just a mess right now so I’ll try to spare you the ramblings of “the other mom”. 

Dealing with Lying.

Here are the scriptures & such that Taylor is working on:

“Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies.”  - Ps. 34:13

“The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in men who are truthful.”  Prov. 12:22

“Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue lasts only a moment.”  Prov. 12:19

“Do not steal.  Do not lie.  Do not deceive one another.”  Lev. 19:11

“You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”  John 8:32

“Do everything without complaining or arguing.  Then you will be blameless & innocent.  You will shine like stars among people who are crooked and corrupt.  You will be God’s children without any fault among the world.”  Phil. 2:14-15

“Whatever happens, give thanks, because it is God’s will in Christ Jesus that you do this.”  1 Thes. 5:18

“Every person should obey the government in power.  No government would exist if it hadn’t been established by God.  The government which exists have been put in place by God.”   Rom 13:1

I also had her:

Define:  Honesty, Lie, Deceit/Deception

Find Synonyms & Antonyms for honesty.

Copy & Memorize:

“Honesty is a commitment to truth in thought, word, and deed.  Telling the truth is the key to good character.  An honest person can be trusted; he is reliable and other people can count on her.  Honesty involves making a conscious decision (and daily choices) to base your life upon the truth and to live in truth.”

“The lie is the refuge of the coward when he is found out in a fault.”  - Charlotte Mason

“A man who lies to himself, and believes his own lies, becomes unable to recognize truth, either in himself or in anyone else, and he ends up losing respect for himself and for others.  When he has no respect for anyone, he can no longer love, and in him, he yields to his impulses, indulges in the lowest form of pleasure, and behaves in the end like an animal in satisfying his vices.  And it all comes from lying to others and yourself.”  -Fyodor Dostoevsky

After she memorized the first section (which I found HERE) she smiled & said, “I feel good.”  It was rewarding for her to have accomplished this.  I was proud of her memorization, but more proud out of the self-satisfaction she got out of it.  More than proud though, I am hopeful it is the Lord working on her heart.  Lying has been a demon our daughter has had to fight for a very long time & she will more than likely have to fight this “addiction” her entire life.  I’m not sure what her motive is or what exactly she is “getting out of it” but I will say it is very frustrating being the one holding her accountable & encouraging her when I know she is seeing her mom lie & deceive us (& in her eyes, getting away with it). I can only imagine as a young girl how confusing this must be for her.  As an adult it makes the mama bear in me come out.  Yes, her mother is fully aware of this & still continues down the same path.  I just pray she doesn’t drag Taylor down it with her.  I try to find comfort in know Who is directing her path . . . 

The Mustangs’ Reading Books

The boys are learning to read this year & as part of our Language Arts lesson plans with Winter Promise they are each to have their own personal reading dictionary.  There were a few other things I wanted to keep track of in addition to the new words they are learning, so I added a few things to it:

Here is the actual dictionary part.  Click here to download the page template I created.  I used one of the LIFE alpha’s from Weeds & Wildflowers for the letters on the side & stapled them on each page with a mini stapler.  I did the binding using my proclick.

They add each new word they learn to read to it & draw a picture of it above:

    

I also added a reading review section & sight words lists with all the words they will be responsible for.

They are so proud of their new books & are doing fabulous with learning to read. 

A Few of My Favorite Things . . .

 

Paper, pens, pencils, crayons, markers, OH MY!!

This sounds so silly, but admit it - we all have our favorite pen.

Some of our kids are particular with a certain type of crayons . . .

Although they are not practical, I like the mini pens, pencils, & highlighters.

I have a drawer full of bright colorful pens.

Sharpie pens are AWESOME!!

I just love the look of freshly sharpened colored pencils.

Paper Mate's pencils are my favorite pencils!!!

Sticky notes are a must have!! I use them A LOT!

 

I also use the little sticky page markers too (- I'm sure they have a real name)

Index cards - I can never have enough index cards around here either.

As for the kids - We have a HUGE stash of colored construction paper!

One of my little guys does really well with the Handwriting Without Tears mini crayons & pencils because his hands are itty bitty.  Another one has chubby little fingers so he needs the big fat triangle crayons & pencils.

They both love to use markers & I even let them use bingo markers for some of their work.

My older kids are not picky, but I have had to color code their pencils because they even fight over pencils!!!

So what is inside your desk? 

Little Buckaroo’s Workboxes

Here is the youngest outlaw’s little area in our schoolroom: 

*Please note: this does NOT mean he just hangs out here perfectly content, playing with his workboxes all day.  No!  No!  No!  - that is what I’m saying 99% of the time.  He is ALL OVER THE PLACE.  This is his area, but not necessarily where he hangs :)

 

Considering we live on a farm, most of this is familiar to my Lil’ Buckaroo’s daily life, so I’ve created a little farm theme in is area:

 

*The rug, farm toys & barn are from IKEA.  The magnet board is from IKEA too & the magnets are so old they were Tyler’s (Melissa & Doug I think).  There is also more farm theme toys in his workboxes.

 

Here is the top of his workboxes – the stacking numbers are from Lakeshore, the stacking cups are from Discovery Toys, & the beaded maze & hammering toy are from IKEA.

 

Here are his shape sorting toys:

And more boxes:

Signing & Activity books, first words, colors, animals, lacing, blocks, & doodle tray:  

He does NOT rotate through all of these boxes every day.  In fact, he probably doesn’t even get to them all each week.  His favorites are the animal touch & feel cards & talking farm toy, the balls – he loves the oballs, & the doodle tray. 

Truman is definitely in the wild toddler stage.  He is a complete terror!!  Outside of his area he love the Montessori stuff & playing the sand trays . . . more on these soon!

_ _ _ – _ _ _ _ _

 

Can you guess what the title spells?

Daddy’s girl is NOT the only child in our house that needs a little creative correcting.  I call them all outlaws remember?  The boys have had some issues with picking their clothes up off the floor A LOT lately.  You would think they were a bunch of silly girls considering how often they change clothes.  I was constantly tripping over dirty clothes or finding clean ones thrown out all over the place as a result of them hunting something in particular.  It was seriously on my everlasting nerve.  After yelling & threatening didn’t seem to work, I realized I needed a little creativity to solve the problem.  (*I’m still working on starting with creativity rather than resorting to it as a final attempt)

 

I wrote lines on our dry-erase board in the kitchen hang-man style & told the boys that every time I saw their clothes picked up I would add a letter to spell:

 

And as soon as they spelled it they would get their choice of ice-cream:  root-beer float, sunday, banana split, whatever!  Guess what?  It worked!!  Every day for 8 days they kept their clothes picked up without me even having to remind them.  They didn’t miss one day.  I’m hoping now they have formed the habit of picking their clothes up, but we may have to do it again one more time :)

*I had the same issue with Taylor (& still do sometimes), but I used Lisa Whelchel’s idea from her book – every time I walked into her room & found clothes on the floor I got to pick her outfit for the next day.  And it wasn’t always super fashionable.  :)  Other idea’s include making a reward chart & once they meet their goal buy them a new outfit (girls LOVE this one!!!) or get a trash bag & confiscate any clothes on the floor – making them either earn it back (ie. by not leaving clothes in the floor for a set amount of time) or by giving it away.  Let me tell you, had I of been able to do this it probably would have only taken once, but Taylor being the only girl, I just couldn’t part with some of her outfits & it would be my luck that she would leave one of my favorites in the floor.  

Baseball Mom

T-shirt available HERE

I hate to admit it but I am that mom in the stands.  You know, the screaming lunatic.  The one you want to remind “it is just a game.”  The one all the coaches probably hate.  Yep!  That’s me.

I try to control myself.  I try not to get to into the game so much, but sometimes it just gets the best of me.  I wish it were only when Tyler smacks a ball way out into the outfield or he makes a double play, but it’s not.  I’m also screaming “GET THE BALL”  “RUN HARD”  “DON’T YOU LET THAT BALL GET BY YOU!!”

AND, it isn’t just at my kid :)  Last weekend there was a lot of built up frustration (I’ll get to that in a minute) & I just couldn’t hold it in any longer…  I flew out of my seat screaming, “OH COME ON!!  THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE!!”  Then there was the week before when a coach on the opposing team told his pitcher to hit the batter.  2 batters in a row!!  Guess whose kid was #2 to be hit?  I totally lost it when I saw the coach laugh as Ty was hit.  Yeah, I’m pretty sure they would have had to of pulled me off of him had he of done it again this week when we played them.  I did warn the ump that I thought I could take him & I wasn’t afraid.  Just sayin’  :)  I’m not kidding!  Just find me on facebook & check my status updates Saturday afternoons.

Tyler has played baseball faithfully since he was 3 years old (no, I wasn’t this bad then – it’s been a slow process.  The older he gets the more competitive it gets.)  He has had some really good coaches, some not so good coaches . . . Momma D. has even coached his team before.  Yes, we are still friends :)  Last year, he was totally spoiled with having 3 awesome coaches that saw some great potential in his catching & truly coached him & helped him improve a lot.  Their team made it through 2 rounds of the play-offs & were runners up for the championship game.  They did awesome! 

This season Tyler is playing fall baseball for the first time.  And his coaches . . . let’s just say, they are more than likely my least favorite.  ;)  And I’m pretty sure they know it.  I am a screaming lunatic in the stands, but I really try not to be the other baseball mom.  You know, the one that try’s to tell the coach what to do.  At the beginning of the season Tyler asked his coach if he could catch (this was his way of telling a coach he has never played for that he is a catcher).  He told him not to ever ask him again.  He hasn’t.  Next, Saturday is our last games (double-header) & Tyler has not been aloud to catch one time.  Guess who is catching the entire game for ALL the games?  One of the other coaches kid.  Nice.  I’m really okay with that.  He is older, probably has more experience, blah blah blah, BUT there are times he has not played good at all!!!!!  Or we have been so far ahead he could have swapped with another player.  And you’d definitely think one Saturday when they had a double-header & played from 2-8pm he would have gotten to take a break.  Nope.

So, my frustration came out.  *There is way more to the story but you get the idea – The 3 coaches kids are playing the 3 main positions & are only rotated out with each other if at all.  Very very very seldom is another kid pulled in to replace them.  Did I mention the kid that is catching has been using Tyler’s gear?  Yeah.  My kid is cool like that.  Very thoughtful of us to spend $150 on catcher’s gear & haul it around to practice & games for the coaches kid to use.  Anyway, I called the coach & I told him exactly why I was so upset.

I’m not sure he got it.  I wasn’t calling so that he would let Tyler catch.  As nice as it would be for him to play the position he loves most just once, my disappointment was not that we weren’t getting our way.  I was livid that he hasn’t even looked at my son.  Not once has he said, “Ty, put your gear on & let me see what ya got.”  Or even to watch him catch & tell him what he needs to work on.  You know, to COACH him & not just use him as another body to fill in spots on his 3 man team. 

So, all that to ask – I know I’m that mom, but am THAT mom too?

10 Years

Who is this woman huggin’ on my man?

She is my best friend from high school.

Usually I have to have a baby to get to hang out with her . . .

 

But it was our 10 year high school reunion this weekend.

So we partied like rockstars!

     

Well, they did.  I partied like a mama that never gets out.

We had a great time.

Sitting around talkin’ about old times,

Meeting each other’s husbands,

    

I sure do love mine!

It was a good time & a lot of fun!

    

Love ya girls!!!

Time

Do you ever read another blog & wonder if that is really how things go?

Or wonder how does she do it?

I do.  I wonder if Sara's house always stays so clean.  And how everything about Eddie is so dang cool – does she ever leave the house a mess?   And Carrie – I wanna bling my blog & digi scrap like her so badly.  And how does Erica find the time to create such cool school stuff for her homeschool?!  And Darcy, she is an awesome photographer & graphic designer/blog fairy to all the “cool” bloggers.  And ALL these ladies homeschool.  Where do they find the time?

Last month when “structuring” our school days I realized I needed to remind myself of my priorities in which to focus my time on:

1. God. 

2. My family (husband & kids)

3. Myself

4. Our homeschool

5. Our family & friends

In order to do so, I set some person boundaries:

#1:  God FIRST! 

#2 – No computer

#3 – Bedtime 

#4 – Only “work” part-time. 

So how is that workin’ for me, you I ask myself . . .

My morning time with God hasn’t been happening.  I have had very little personal time with Him.  Outside of a few screaming fits I’ve had (*All that end in a relentless surrender on my part) & my usual “mommy prayers”.

The computer, believe it or not, I have held true to this commitment.  My computer time has been cut in half or more!  God is so good.  Honestly, he has truly taken the temptation or desire from me.  So often I sit here & have very little to say or do.

My bedtime has been pretty dang good.  I’ve had a few way too late nights, but not every night.  Now, I’m just working on making bedtime with my children special.

Only “work” part-time.  I have done very well with not letting my photography to interfere with my family.  I am able to walk away from a set of pix & let them sit to be edited.

I have been spending more time with my family.  I’ve played games with the kids (BTW, Tyler is the biggest cheater!!!), we’ve gone fishing, we have kickball games, I’ve given my husband quality time instead of the computer.  It has been nice to let go of all the things I think I want to do, & do the things I really want to be doing.

It is sad to me that I have followed through with all my boundaries fairly consistently, except the one that matters most.  I have got to make my time with God more of a priority & not feed into all the perfectly valid excuses I may have.  I am so tempted to just say that I don’t have time, but then there are the things I do seem to have time for . . .  Shameful.  Although Big Daddy seems to think I have unlimited time since I don’t have the “have-to” of a “real” job.  I would be to differ.  In fact, I feel like my time is everyone elses.  To be perfectly completely honest.  I have done a really good job of giving my family more time, but at the end of the day I still find myself starving for a little me time.  Not necessarily doing anything, just doing whatever I want to do. 

BUT, I know my time really isn’t my time.  And it isn’t theirs either.  It is HIS.  So to get me back on track, I am going to be re-reading Lisa Whelchel’s book The Me In Mommy & I will be using her Personal Mom Coaching beginning with taking care of my spirit.  I will be working on hiding the Word of God in my heart as I memorize scripture.

What are you doing with your time?

FOR TODAY

 
Outside my window... the wind is gently blowing, the wildflowers cover the pasture & are absolutely beautiful.  The sound of birds singing fill the air.  If I listen closely enough I hear a woodpecker near.

I am thinking... my children are all growing so quickly.  How blessed am I to have these wonderful kids that call me mom?

I am thankful for... more than I deserve.  My very supportive husband who works very hard to provide for us & is always my biggest fan.  My children of course, life would not be the same without each & every one of these brats lovely kids.  I can’t imagine not being able to stay home with them – watching them grow & learn & bond with each other.  What a blessing.  Most of all God’s unconditional love & grace.  For it is only from this that I have the other. 

From the learning rooms... giggles.  Lot’s of giggling from 4 of my favorite boys. 

From the kitchen... Notathing.  No cookin’ for me today!!!  Yippee!!!

I am wearing... Sports shorts, a nursing tank if you must know the details, & my black & hot pink Nikes.

I am creating...  lot’s of memories.

I am going... fishing.

I am reading... Photoshop Elements 8 For Dummies.

I am hoping... Truman will take a nap.  A long nap.  A very long nap!

I am hearing... the dog bark at the cows.

Around the house... is a total disaster!

One of my favorite things... My new king size bed, my camera duh!, my coach purse, my favorite jeans, my iPhone, Weeds & Wildflowers digi scrap, my SCHOOLROOM, etc.  Yes, mom – you too.  My mama & my dad, my brother & sister, my wonderful girlfriends. . . Dang, I have a pretty good life :)

 

The Creative Mama

Oh this girl.  She is definitely giving me a run for my money.  Pushing all the right wrong buttons.  Testing every inch of my patience.  Taking 10 miles when you give an inch . . .  Same ol’ dance, just a different tune. 

But I’m getting creative remember?  ;)

So, just how creative have I become these days?
Well, let me tell you . . . This little diva decided she would tell all the girls at school that I made her eat rotten food as part of her punishment (I’m creative, but NOT cruel).  So, for a few days she had a little humiliation of getting her picture taken at every meal as proof she was being fed well (Chicken Fried Steak, Mash Taters, & Mac ‘n Cheese – hardly rotten!) 
As part of her “loosing everything” for lying CONTINUALLY, signing my name on one of her papers, & failing to give me her progress report & telling her teacher I just didn’t sign it because I was too busy & didn’t care – she lost the privilege of buying a lunch (*this is a “cool” thing for her – none of the “cool” kids bring a lunch).  And what do you know, Day 1:  She “forgets” her lunch.  Guess who hand delivered it just in time to hang out all of her lunch time with her & her “cool” friends?  Yep.  If I gotta take her lunch to school then I might as well stay, right?  I really enjoyed myself too & while I was there – I cleared up a few misunderstandings as her friends had the wrong impression of me as the awful terrible wicked step-mom.  UPDATE:  She hasn’t forgotten her lunch again.
As I mentioned above, lying is the main issue we are dealing with concerning Miss “I Think I’m Smarter Than You & I Can Get Away With It”.  We are seriously at our wits-end with the lying.  So for the past few weeks she had almost all her privileges taken away.  That didn’t seem to do the trick, so she had a few punishments add . . . She not only has to go to bed early, but she also has to get up early.  Early to bed, early to rise.  :)  The dishwasher is a total amenity, so she now has to wash dishes by hand.  She also has had an extra chore of my choice or a la carte the “Job Jar” each day.  Add copying some scriptures about lying, writing a few definitions, memorizing a quote on lying, & reading a book.  Then there is the physical labor . . . Ahh, welcome to boot-camp girlfriend.  Running, sit-ups, & push-ups galore! 
We didn’t get to this point overnight, she has “earned” every bit of her consequences, but with that said, she is also earning everything back.  We’ve listed all her lost privileges & punishments on bits of paper & made a special jar just for her.  When we notice she is doing well or told the truth about something she gets to draw out of her jar.  When her attitude is bad or she is caught lying it starts all over. 
Lying is a huge deal to me.  If I ever have to go to bat for my kids or if something awful ever happens to them, I have to be able to trust them & believe what they are telling me.  At first, I would just get angry with her lies, then it really hurt my feelings, now it is truly taking a toll on our relationship – especially because I’m usually the one she is pointing fingers at blaming for her bad choices.  Yes, we are working on taking responsibility for our own actions as well.

Welcome to the Country

   

Fishies

Can you guess what the boys are looking at in our aquarium? 

. . . 4 years ago Big Daddy built an addition onto this old house which we made our living room.  It is the one room I have very little control over.  Our living room is home to a huge elk head, several deer heads, a bobcat, & a 300 gallon aquarium.  We’ve kept all kinds of fresh water fish in here.  Usually whatever big catch the boys get calls this bad boy its new home.  We have never, in 4 years, had the pleasure of seeing a fish have babies . . . Until NOW!!!!

This fish wasn’t eating & was growing rather “skinny” as Big Daddy described.  He assumed she was sick, until he got a close look inside her mouth!  Where he found THOUSANDS of babies swimming around.  This particular breed (I can’t remember the name & Tyler is sleeping & Big D is already gone to work), they mouth brood.  They carry their eggs in their mouth until the babies hatch & are big enough to swim out.  It is the coolest thing ever!  As we watched this mother of thousands of babies protect them I suddenly felt a little sigh of relief with just 6 to protect.  :)  It was such a blessing to be able to see God’s hand in this experience.  She had thousands of babies & if just one swam out she was doing everything to get it back – 1 out of a couple thousand.   

Typically, you would add moss to a tank & separate the mother & babies from the rest of the tank, but that was nearly impossible for us to do in a 300 gal tank.  We added moss to the area she was claiming as hers, & despite her protective motherly instincts her babies all eventually swam out & were eaten by the bigger fish.  I almost cried every time I witnessed this.  So sad.  Yes, I totally used this as an example to my kids!! “See, see what happens when mommy tries to protect you & you leave my protection?  Those babies were safe with their mama, but they wanted out.  They didn’t know or understand that she was just trying to protect them from the outside world they were so eager to be apart of, that was full of bigger fish waiting to devour them.  See, sometimes mama’s do know better.  Next time you better trust mommy or you’ll be eaten by bigger fish!”  

   

Sadly, all but 5 survived.  They are now living in a smaller tank in my bedroom. 

They are the cutest little fishies!!!

God is amazing!!!!