It’s been nearly a year since our daughter, Taylor, went to live with her mom & I have been very reserved in updating very much detail on the situation. It was a very dark season of life for us & still brings a wave of emotions & opinions. When she first left I shared this vision,
“He (God) is at work in our daughter’s life & I feel something big is going to happen.”
I couldn’t pin-point it, but was willing to put all my trust in the Lord & wait for, as one of my readers described, that the other side of the tapestry to be revealed in all its glory.
Well, I think we are beginning to see the bigger picture & it is WAY bigger than I ever imagined!
*Please know I am sharing this with permission*
Taylor’s mom is in the hospital. She is 26 weeks pregnant & has been diagnosed with a serious heart condition (the 2 main valves in her heart are leaking). The baby appears to be developing at a healthy rate, but she is not expected to carry the pregnancy to 30 weeks & has been given a 70% chance of dying within the first 24 hours of delivery.
I visited her last week & was truly in awe of the way the Lord filled her room. From the smile on her face, the peace in her voice, the people that visited her, the concern of the nurses . . . God was so there!! I went there to witness to her – to encourage & pray with her, but I think she did way more for me than I did for her. We serve a mighty & awesome God don’t we?
Just months ago, I sat in bed for 6 long weeks of bedrest praying I would not loose my baby & trying to wrap my mind around the risk having a bloodclot put me at personally. I struggled with my fear. I learned first hand, after burying a baby, that trusting & believing God to answer my prayers, doesn’t always mean answering them the way I want Him too. It was a true battlefield in my mind to be okay with God’s plan in the situation.
I sit here tonight, my boys tucked in their beds, expecting to deliver a healthy baby any day now, overjoyed with the Lord’s blessings upon me. A part of me is so excited for what is going on in my life, but another part of me hurts deeply for the woman in another hospital who doesn’t know if she will ever see her unborn child. Who am I Lord?
Eight years ago today sat in a hospital room & watched my less than 1 pound baby boy’s heart stop beating in the palm of my husbands hand. I felt the fear every mother dreads. I wasn’t where she is & our circumstances are a lot different, but I can empathize with her slightly. All I can say is from one mom to another that has been down the path of being totally dependent on the Lord & trusting His plan without understanding it – I sense the same peace that came over me in those dark days in Taylor’s mom. Her light is shinning & she has the peace that only comes from the Lord.
Please lift April, her unborn daughter – Jayla, & Taylor up in prayer.
“Lord, I lift April up to you & pray for protection over her & her baby. Protect her spirit, body, & emotions from any harm. I pray that sickness may have no hold over her life. Specifically Lord I ask that you heal her heart. Give the doctors wisdom & guide them in her care. I pray she will seek you as her refuge & walk in your ways so that she may remain under your protection. Keep her safe in all that she does & wherever she goes. Cover her in Your faithful love & mighty mercy, show her your amazing grace! I pray all of this in your son Jesus’ name.”
People say God never gives us more than we can handle, but really He does. I believe that sometimes God allows us to be in a position so HE is all we have. Nothing is impossible without Him! Even at the worst time God is shaping us for what is ahead. What the devil means for evil our God WILL bring good from it!!